blood red moon
~ a Shadow of Destiny fanfiction
Chapter Ten
It wasn’t over, even when his feet touched on safe ground. Homunculus shrugged Eike off, ignoring him as he focused entirely on raising shields, drawing wards, protecting himself and his realm as Atropos tried her best to batter down the walls. He could sense her easily on the other side of what seemed a pathetically thin barrier, Atropos so consumed by her own fury that he wondered if even Dopple was afraid of her now, even if they shared the same small body.
All he could do was steady himself, chant cantrips and stay calm with the knowledge that, even with all her rage, sheer power would not be enough to break through all of his spells. In the final tally, he was more clever than Atropos, and she knew it.
//Likely the reason she’s so upset, she knows I won’t give her the chance to surprise me again.//
He’d never be here, though, if it hadn’t been for Eike, if the crazy human fool hadn’t managed to fool her with one-third of a plan and a moment or two of incredible luck. Homunculus smirked, remembering Dopple’s frightened shriek, as he felt Atropos’ powers waning now, behind shields as thick and impenetrable as a bank vault’s doors. He turned to see if Eike might share the smile, celebrating such an improbable victory, and instead found himself stunned mute.
Eike lay half-crumpled against the massive pillar at the center of his realm, breathing in slow, heavy gasps as he tried to keep most of his weight on his shoulders and arms. The remnants of the lower half of his coat were dark brown with blood, which still seemed to be flowing quite freely in a thin red sheet down his back.
//He...// Homunculus knew what had happened, remembered Atropos launching the stones in a blast of wind and power and rage, heard Eike stifle a cry as he kept the djinn in front of him, out of the way, but he hadn’t imagined it could have been that bad.
//He protected me. He blocked the attack, to keep me safe.// It made sense, was the logical extension of Eike coming to save him at all, but it still wasn’t easy to believe. The djinn couldn’t make sense of it.
“Eike?” He was half certain that the man was dead, felt a soft lurch of something akin to dread, as there was no way to bring him back, not with Atropos lurking outside like a tiger, and though he could certainly find another Eike, he wouldn’t have the same memories, there would be too much to explain.
//A different Eike might not have come to rescue me, like he did.//
The djinn didn’t realize he had been expecting the worst, until he jumped, as glassy green eyes glanced up at him, and Eike smiled weakly.
“You’re supposed to be the fragile one, and yet I’m the one who keeps getting beaten up. I wasn’t really built for this either, you know.”
“Why did you do that? Why did you keep me from getting hurt?”
The look in Eike’s eyes was neither vague nor kind, but rather familiar, Homunculus recognized it as one of his own, when one of his masters had said or done something exceptionally stupid. It was all the answer the djinn would get, Eike closed his eyes and bowed his head, blond hair hiding most of his face from view as he went back to trembling against the pain.
“Your hair is down.” Homunculus would have glared at himself if it were possible, considered slapping himself, as hard as Atropos had, to stop any more insipid babble.
“You’re wonderfully insightful today.”
“You look like a woman.”
Eike laughed then, a tight little sound. “I’m just going to pretend it’s the blood loss messing with my hearing, and I didn’t actually hear that.” A second glance up, he pushed the hair clumsily behind one ear to see the djinn clearly, and then sighed, somewhere between sorrow and regret.
//He thinks I’m going to let him die.// Eike couldn’t have known that the djinn was just too shocked to move, still trying to figure out what had happened. Homunculus turned back towards his shields, just for a moment, making sure Atropos had given up trying to break in before moving, kneeling at Eike’s side.
“You’ve certainly made a mess of yourself.” The djinn made a slight, jerking motion with one hand, heard the blond hiss as a fragment pulled out of his skin, as if connected to an invisible wire, falling into Homunculus’s pale hand. He held it between thumb and forefinger for a moment, it still sparkled a bit, even with the blood.
“Glass. How exactly were you expecting this to work?”
“Just like it did, I suppose. I thought she would be startled enough to give you a few moments to think of a way out.” He winced, as the djinn pulled out another fragment, chuckling softly at the extent of Eike’s ‘plan’.
“What if I didn’t know what to do next?”
“You always do. I wasn’t too worried about that.” Eike sighed, folding his arms over one another, resting his head on his hands as the djinn continued his work. “It wasn’t just Dopple we were fighting, was it? I thought she seemed strange... but how?”
“I’m not sure how. The creature you spoke to is called Atropos, one of the Fates.” Eike trembled, but whether it was from the name or just because of the pain, he couldn’t tell. “I don’t know how she managed to inhabit Dopple’s body, but it seems she means to use it to start a war against the djinni, to destroy my kind.”
“We’re not the good guys in all of this, are we?”
“The answer to that is rather relative. I certainly don’t consider myself a villain... but if you’re asking if what she’s doing is justified, even then? No, not hardly. The Fates are not allowed to manipulate events in this way, she has played off a technicality by taking Dopple’s body, changing her form. It is her hatred fueling this fight, not righteousness.”
Eike didn’t answer, and Homunculus continued his work, pulling out chips of glass from the man’s back, using a little power to mend the skin underneath. He had enough power now, even if he didn’t dare reach beyond his sanctuary, knew Atropos had to still be near, waiting for an opening.
“I did what she said, though... didn’t I? Creating Dopple, destroying all those people, all those futures.”
“It wasn’t you, it was a different Eike. An entirely different collection of experiences and-”
Eike shook his head fiercely.
“It /was/ me! It doesn’t matter if I can’t remember or it hasn’t happened yet. I wished for immortality and I set you free and I made her.” His voice was hoarse, as he pressed his face against the back of his hands. “I started this whole nightmare, it’s all because of me.”
Homunculus sighed, pulling out another long sliver. What stupid, illogical creatures humans could be, as if they /preferred/ to wallow in guilt.
“You could be the greatest monster known to man, you wouldn’t have made it to the end of your century if I hadn’t been there to grant your wish. It’s as much my fault as it is yours. Try not to be so dramatic.”
Eike had turned as much as he could, staring at him, the shock slowly shifting into a weary smile. “I keep forgetting you’re you.” He shifted, a little of the pain falling from his shoulders. “Back feels better, better than it did.”
“I’m nearly done.” The djinn pulled another splinter, flicking his fingers as it hovered in the air, to toss it into a growing pile on the floor. “I can’t do much for your clothes. I suppose I could, actually, I just don’t care enough.”
He knew why he was being such a bastard to Eike. It wasn’t a good excuse, there wasn’t /any/ good excuse, really, but that didn’t mean he could stop.
“Fair enough.” Eike flinched again, just after Homunculus removed the last of the glass. He was trembling, eyes tightly shut, and though he was sitting right in front of him, the djinn was certain he was far, far away.
“I thought it might have destroyed you, what she did. It hurts?” Stupid question. Eike nodded back, no strength to spare on words.
“I should take those memories back, then-”
He reached forward, but Eike’s hand closed gently around his.
“It’s all right. I’d rather keep them. I can... it isn’t easy, but I need to know.” He sighed, readjusting what remained of his jacket, pulling himself up until he was sitting on the pillar, hands on his knees. “I need to know as much as I can.”
Homunculus tried very hard not to flinch at the implication, paired with an unnerving sharpness in the green eyes that met his. He knew that look, it was the look he was given just before a vicious wish was asked, before he was forced to do some painful trick of magic at the whim of someone who did not care. At all.
He chose to ignore it, pretending to busy himself tidying up with the loose ends of the spell, pushing the edges of the room back to their former dimensions. He tried to convince himself he wasn’t hanging on every word Eike wasn’t saying.
------------------------
It wasn’t easy at all, trying to keep it all together, trying to keep his mind on his own thoughts and not all those other things Dopple - no, Atropos now - all those things she had thrown into his mind. It was pure chaos, all the notions and memories of that other Eike, everything until that last thought, the worst of all, that he would rather die than see Homunculus not suffer.
//He is not my enemy.//
The djinn could be, quite easily, and seemed to have a natural affection for not helping anyone or anything but himself, but for the moment he was helping Eike, and what this Atropos wanted to do, this war... it was no longer a matter of merely his own destruction. He could choose to erase himself now, to correct some small part of the wrong that had been done, and she would still strike out against Homunculus and the others - and though he didn’t say it, Eike had the feeling it would not be a bloodless fight. The lives of those innocents in the unlucky times that would end up part of the battlefield didn’t matter much to either side.
//He is not my enemy. He doesn’t want to destroy things, not like she does, he never did, and so he’s the one to trust.//
Eike kept his mind on that thought, so apart from the rantings of the other, delusional him who had created Dopple out of so much rage and hate. He could bear it, hold up under the weight of two realities in his mind as long as he was certain of what to believe.
“I need to know as much as I can.”
It was a bit more complicated than that, though, wasn’t it? He already knew a great deal, if everything that other djinn had said was true. He just wanted Homunculus to admit it.
He waited, watching the djinn move a bit about the room, always keeping his back to him. It was strange to look at him, really /look/ ever since he’d gotten over his initial shock and actually bothered to think about what he was seeing. A body almost human, but not quite, with skin that shone oddly in the light, and features that occasionally seemed painted on. It was entirely unnatural, but not /wrong/, not something that needed to be undone. Eike wondered if that made any sense at all. He remembered what the djinn had said, about fragility and handicap.
“Ornamental.”
He didn’t mean to think it, certainly didn’t mean to say it loud, but it was difficult to judge those sorts of things while trying to keep track of everything in his mind too, his thoughts now all part of a delicate balancing act. Homunculus turned sharply. He’d provoked an old emotion, he could see it flicker behind the constant veneer of disdain, red eyes flickering like candle flames.
“What did you say?”
//The most powerful of them all, that’s what the other djinn said. He must loathe that body. It must gnaw on him all the time that he’s trapped inside of it.// Just like the thought of losing his memories had nearly driven him to panicked flight. A strange connection, for two such dissimilar creatures.
“I... spoke with one of your friends.”
“I don’t have any friends.”
Eike fought back a moment of exasperation. Were all his conversations with the pale man going to be so impossible?
“One of your kind, then, another djinn. He’s the one who fixed the Digipad.” Eike remembered the machine, took it out of his pocket. “It helped me find you.” He paused, ready to give it back, as Homunculus lifted a hand, a strange little smile on his face.
“No, /don’t/ throw it at me.” Homunculus took it from Eike’s hand instead, withdrawing to the bookcase, not returning. The conversation had turned into a strange game not unlike tennis, maybe badminton, something slow and fragile. Serve, volley, hold your breath after each shot, wait to see what might happen next.
“So, you met a ‘friend’ of mine? I don’t suppose he gave you his name?”
Homunculus didn’t meet his eyes, voice full of an affected carelessness, a casual disinterest so unlike the meticulous man Eike was certain he was bluffing.
“He gave me yours.”
It got the reaction he’d expected, Homunculus’s pale face warring from shock to fury, finally settling on a disgusted mixture of both. He considered telling the djinn he couldn’t remember it, let alone pronounce it, and had no idea what he was supposed to do with it even if he could nave managed either of those two things. Of course, unfair as it was, Homunculus tended to trade information only in the face of a direct threat, and Eike had nothing else to bargain with.
“Well, aren’t you the lucky one.” The djinn’s voice was stiff, terse, any friendship that might have been growing between them obviously dead, buried and danced on for good measure. Eike pressed on despite it.
“I didn’t understand a lot of what he told me, about your past, why you were in the stone in the first place. I’d like to know.”
It was rather clear Homunculus didn’t want to answer, though Eike assumed that might be more out of sheer stubbornness than the thought that he could do anything with the knowledge. Just for a moment, they were caught in a stare down, and Eike swore that the djinn almost looked frightened.
“My first... master.” The word was sharp enough to draw blood, edged in a limitless hate. “My first master summoned me to this world. He was powerful enough to match me in most ways, and clever enough to make up for the rest. The moment I arrived, he trapped me with this.” Homunculus tapped the limiter with a pale finger.
“Trapped me in this fragile frame, determined to get more than one wish, more than a thousand wishes. I suppose I should respect his cunning, maybe even his greed.” The djinn cast his eyes down, lifting his arms, hands out.
“He gave me this useless shell of a body, he was the only one who could release me and I knew he never would. He enjoyed my frailty. It made me exotic, untouchable. I suppose I was lucky for that. The jackals he called friends admired him greatly because he had captured me, that in all my power I was only a slave to his ability.” A thin, bitter smile - were all the djinn’s emotions so jaded? “He said I was beautiful.”
Eike didn’t realize he’d laughed, just slightly, until Homunculus turned on him, the fury sharpening the edge of his light tone. “Which part do you find so amusing?”
“I... well, it’s obvious, isn’t it? Of course you are. Beautiful, I mean.”
It seemed obvious enough to him. For all creature’s strangeness Homunculus was a collection of nothing but the most unearthly, delicate features, too perfect to be anything of flesh and blood. It was like looking at a masterpiece, a sculptor’s greatest masterpiece. There wasn’t any other word to describe him but beautiful. Who knew, though, maybe demons - djinni, whatever - didn’t have a word for it. He doubted they visited many museums.
“Oh?” A real smile this time, or at least Homunculus sneered with crisp amusement instead of disdain, a satisfied smirk. “Am I?”
Eike sighed, refusing to answer the teasing comment. The world had gone far too crazy for one compliment, sane or no, to seem as insane as it probably was.
“So what happened to him, if he was so smart? The man who, I mean your... the one who-” He danced inelegantly around the label, knowing it could only offend.
“My master?” Again, the sneer. “He boasted and bragged, once too often in the wrong places. In the end, no surprise, his pride became his undoing. He acted rashly, in the wrong places, against the wrong people, and they called him a witch and had him stoned to death.”
“So, then you took his soul?”
Homunculus shook his head, his arms close against his body, rubbing his thumb against his fingertips in small, frustrated motions. He’d been unconsciously taking up less space, protecting himself, as if even a strong enough memory might damage his fragile form.
“I couldn’t. He knew his own ability, knew his power and what he could do with it, right up until the end. He tricked me a final time, and I was left with the limiter, and this body, and no way out.” He sighed, glancing up wearily. “The stone came later, another lovely mistake on my part, another cage. After that, I could only wait until you - Wagner - came along and set me free.”
“... and after I was gone, you didn’t need to seek out another master. You didn’t feel it was necessary because I was still alive, but you never had to listen to me again.” Eike frowned. “Now that I know, why haven’t you killed me yourself?”
“We still have a bargain. I can’t kill you, it would mean I broke the deal. The repercussions of that-” Homunculus shook his head. “It isn’t worth discussing. I can’t have your soul until you die, that’s rather the end of it.”
“... but you won’t let me die.”
“No.”
Homunculus wanted him to drop it there, Eike could see it in every line of his tense form. The djinn had nothing more valuable than his pride and Eike was cutting it out with every word.
//I have to know the truth. All of it.//
“I can hurt you, then, can’t I? You didn’t want to tell me, but there are other rules, aren’t there. You belong to me.”
He watched the djinn’s hands clench into pale, trembling fists, and Homunculus finally turned away from him.
“You bastard.”
A few more words, in that strange language of his own, and Homunculus was silent. It was clear to see by the way he stood, he was bracing himself for the end. Eike sighed, at the djinn’s fury and rage and sorrow and the fact that all of it was unnecessary. If he had still held any anger, it had long passed. How else could he have expected such a creature to act, when it was just as the other djinn had said, when Homunculus would never find peace, forever chasing what he knew would only cause him pain.
“You were afraid I would find out, that as soon as I knew, or remembered... that I would use you. I would hurt you simply because I could do so.”
Homunculus didn’t answer, didn’t even turn around, his voice low and soft and desolate. “Get it over with, will you? Just be done with it.”
//I wonder, what does he think I’m going to do?// Whatever it was, whatever wish or order Homunculus thought he would demand, it must have been horrible, Eike could see the djinn fight not to flinch with each step he took closer.
Gently, very gently, Eike reached up, put his hand on the djinn’s back. He felt Homunculus gasp in shock at the simple gesture, freezing up like the statue he resembled. Eike stared for a moment at the contrast between the dark fabric and his pale fingers, how warm the creature was, and how amazingly fragile.
“I’ll never hurt you, not on purpose. You’ve saved my life at least... hell, I’m not even sure how many times, and whatever your motivations are, I’m grateful for it. I am not Wolfgang Wagner, I am /not/, and if I am not, then I have nothing to hate you for. I have no reason or desire to be your master.” Just saying it made him want to wince in disgust. What a pompous, egotistical word. “I’m your ally right now, because neither of us seem to have much choice, but maybe, someday... we might be friends.”
The djinn hadn’t moved, not all the time he had been talking, not even now, when he stopped, and let his hand fall away, and waited. Eike realized he was bracing himself for the worst, just as Homunculus had been doing moments before. He could already imagine the djinn turning with one of his proud, satisfied smiles, that this show of drama had all been some clever trick to ensure that Eike would give up what little power he might have possessed.
//All right, so I’m an idiot. It was still the right thing to do.// He wondered if his conscience would keep congratulating him in the afterlife, if Homunculus decided to destroy him now.
All those thoughts were quickly brushed aside as Homunculus slowly turned to face him. He didn’t look satisfied, or amused, or anything at all, really, just watching him quietly with those brilliant, clear red eyes. Eike really hadn’t seen him like this before, with no trace of boredom or smugness or what he’d always thought was an obvious confidence in his superiority but that might have always been just a bluff, a bold show of force even more fragile than his body.
“You don’t mean that.”
“I do.”
The crimson gaze narrowed, studying him, before speaking with that delicate, precise pattern he had only known Homunculus to have. “Why did you save me, Eike?”
“It was the right thing to do.” He felt that easy answer come and go, but there was more, and he knew it. He’d lost Dana, he’d lost Margarete, he truly had no past and, probably, no real future. Only now, only here, even when this ended he wouldn’t know where to go. The thought left him feeling very, very tired. “I have no one else.”
A small, personal smile graced the corners of the pale man’s mouth, as if they had won some great battle together, as if they were in this together, which of course they were, no matter how strained and difficult and dangerous it seemed at times.
“You have been so alone, haven’t you?”
He wasn’t expecting it, and even though it was the djinn who moved first, he wondered if Homunculus had any idea what he was doing either. In retrospect, it almost seemed necessary, some turning of the planets or star position demanding it as the natural order of things. As it happened - well, he wasn’t exactly sure how it happened. One moment Homunculus was moving forward, reaching up to tug on a strand of Eike’s hair, lifting up on the tips of his toes. The kiss came next. He tried to replay it later in his mind, but couldn’t figure out if there was another moment in there or not.
It was strange, in every way he could think to measure it. The djinn’s lips were not soft, but not stone either, gentle and startlingly warm. The pale skin always made him think of chilled marble, but he’d already known that was a false notion. The kiss seemed ready to burn, and tasted like copper. He didn’t dare move, it could have only lasted a few seconds but it seemed like much, much longer, until the djinn stepped back, staring at him.
He shivered, just a little bit, unsure whether he licked his lips to get rid of that strange metallic aftertaste or to make it stronger, try and break it down into something that made sense. Eike wasn’t exactly sure what he was supposed to say, or do, but thankfully Homunculus seemed just as baffled. The pale man raised a hand to his lips, as if he could take the gesture back that way, and then he turned, belatedly realizing there was nowhere to go.
It was a little difficult, avoiding each other in such a small room, but somehow they managed.
=====================
Author Notes -
Alternate ending:
Hom: *smooch*
Eike: Bleargh.
Hom: Bleargh?! What about you? When’s the last time you brushed your teeth?
Eike: <fanning lips> It feels like I ate about nineteen jalapenos. What, do you work part time as a space heater to support your keen fashion sense?
Hom: <gargling mouthwash> Bighhht megh harghd gyu ghupid gyuhman.
Dopple: *knocking* Guys? <hopping frantically> Can I borrow some toilet paper? We’re all out and Atropos drank too much Gatorade and I reeeeeeeally gotta go.